It's Okay -Cry
When you hurt the worst, it's ok go to your spiritual prayer closet and weep those tears of bitterness out of you. Remember Jesus wept and He also is waiting for you to cry your last tear so He can put His arms' around you.
Jesus never looks away from a crying heart. He said, "A broken heart I will not despise" Psalm 51:17... So go away and cry in your special place, cry until there are no tears left.
Then encourage yourself in the Lord and hand over to Him all your frustrations, anger and bitterness. He only wants your faith, your confidence. Then let the potter begin forming you as He sees you.